Dumb & Dumber
Dumb & Dumber

Dumb & Dumber

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User Rating: 3 / 5
(1 vote)
Year: 1994
Number of Quotes: 77
Submitted by: TheRudyStyle


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Movie Quotes from Dumb & Dumber (1994) (Movie)

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Harry Dunne: Where's the booze?
Lloyd Christmas: I got robbed by a sweet old lady on a motorized cart. I didn't even see it coming.
Harry Dunne: Oh, no, no.
Lloyd Christmas: Come on, Harry.
Harry Dunne: It gets worse. My parakeet, Petey.
Lloyd Christmas: Yeah?
Harry Dunne: He's dead.
Lloyd Christmas: Oh, man, I'm sorry. What happened?
Harry Dunne: His head fell off.
Lloyd Christmas: His head fell off?
Harry Dunne: Yeah. He was pretty old.
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Harry Dunne: What's in the briefcase?
Lloyd Christmas: Man, I would have to be a real lowlife to go rooting around in someone else's private property.
Harry Dunne: Is it locked?
Lloyd Christmas: Yeah. Really well.
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Harry Dunne: Yesterday was one of the greatest days of my life. Mary and I went skiing, we made a snowman, she touched my leg...
Lloyd Christmas: Okay, Kill Him!
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Lloyd Christmas: Some people just aren't cut out for life on the road.
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State Trooper: You fellas been doing a bit of boozing, have you? Suckin back on grandpa's old cough medicine?
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Lloyd Christmas: She actually talked to me.
Harry Dunne: Get outta here!
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Lloyd Christmas: Mock
Harry Dunne: Yeah!
Lloyd Christmas: Ing
Harry Dunne: Yeah!
Lloyd Christmas: Bird
Harry Dunne: Yeah!
Lloyd Christmas: Yeah!
Harry Dunne: Yeah!
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[checking Harry & Lloyd's apartment]
Joe 'Mental' Mentaliano: Briefcase ain't here, they must've taken it with them.
J.P. Shay: Well, he's gotta come home sometime.
Joe 'Mental' Mentaliano: Maybe we should trash the place, send them a little message.
J.P. Shay: [looks around] I don't think he's gonna get that message Joe, I mean, the guy's got worms in his living room.
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Lloyd Christmas: We don't usually pick up hitchhikers... but I'm-a gonna go with my instincts on this one. Saddle up partner!
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Beth Jordan: So I told myself. Beth you just got to run girl and oh you know what that clutz did next?
Lloyd Christmas: No and I DON'T CARE!
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Lloyd Christmas: [to motorcycle cop] Tic-Tac, sir?
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Lloyd Christmas: Wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world?
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Dale's Man: They're driving an '84... Sheepdog.
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Harry Dunne: What's her last name? I'll look it up.
Lloyd Christmas: You know, I don't really recall. Starts with an S! Let's see. Swim? Swammi? Slippy? Slappy? Swenson? Swanson?
Harry Dunne: Maybe it's on the briefcase.
Lloyd Christmas: Oh, yeah! It's right here.
[He reads the manufacturer's name, which is Samsonite]
Lloyd Christmas: Samsonite! I was way off! I knew it started with an S, though.
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Mrs. Neugeboren: Where have you been? My dogs were supposed to be here FORTY minutes ago! Now, I hardly have any time to primp them!
Harry Dunne: Don't worry about a thing, Mrs. Noogieburger.
Mrs. Neugeboren: NEUGEBOREN!
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Joe 'Mental' Mentaliano: Gas man. How the hell did they know that I got gas?
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[while looking back at Mary]
Lloyd Christmas: There's really nothing to worry about Mary. Statistically, they say you're more likely to get killed on the way to the airport. You know, like on a head on crash or flying off a cliff or getting trapped under a gas truck! That's the worst! I have this cousin, well y'know, I had this cousin...
[Lloyd drives right through a red light, causing a fatal accident visible in the window]
Mary Swanson: Uh, Lloyd, could you keep your eyes on the road please?
Lloyd Christmas: Oh, yeah! Good thinking. You can't be too careful. There are a lot of bad drivers out there.
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Lloyd Christmas: [sees framed newspaper article about moon landing] No Way! That's...
[chuckles]
Lloyd Christmas: WE'VE LANDED ON THE MOON!
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Harry Dunne: I can't believe it.
Lloyd Christmas: Life is a fragile thing, Har. One minute you're chewin' on a burger, the next minute you're dead meat.
Harry Dunne: But he blamed me. You heard him. Those were his last words.
Lloyd Christmas: Not if you count the gurgling sound.
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State Trooper: Pullover!
Harry Dunne: No, it's a cardigan but thanks for noticing.
Lloyd Christmas: Yeah, killer boots man!

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