Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
Ace Ventura: Pet Detective

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective

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User Rating: 0 / 5
(0 votes)
Year: 1994
Number of Quotes: 57
Submitted by: TheRudyStyle


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Movie Quotes from Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994) (Movie)

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Ace Ventura: Melissa it's ace!
Melissa Robinson: Ace where are you?
Ace Ventura: I'm in Psychoville and Finkel's the mayor!
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Ace Ventura: [a swarm of animals emerge from various hiding places] Come to me my animal friends!
[Ace sings in a falsetto voice]
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Ron Camp: [Ace emerges soaking wet] I'm so Sorry Mr. Ace, I'll have the plumbing checked immediately.
Ace Ventura: Well I hope so, had I been drinking out of the toilet, I might have been killed.
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[repeated line]
Ace Ventura: LOOO-HOOO-ZUH-HER!
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Ace Ventura: [to Shickadance] Why don't come to take a look inside? C'mon. C'mon!
[he shakes his keys acting like they're stuck. The door opens. Ace enters]
Ace Ventura: Go ahead. Snoop around!
[Mr. Shickadance enters, looks around and sniffs]
Ace Ventura: Well? Are you satisfied?
Mr. Shickadance: Just don't let me catch you with an animal here, that's all.
Ace Ventura: All right! Take care now! Bye-bye, then!
[slams door in front of Mr. Shickadance's face]
Ace Ventura: L-oser!
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Ace Ventura: Holy shitballs.
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Melissa Robinson: Ace, get out of the tank.
Ace Ventura: [talking like Scotty from Star Trek] I just can't do it, Captain. I don't have the power.
Melissa Robinson: I said, get out of the tank now!
Ace Ventura: For God's sake, Jim, I'm a doctor, not a pool man!
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Melissa Robinson: You know what? I'm not even going to talk to you. Would you please leave.
Ace Ventura: Why? So you can beat him?
[talking about Melissa's dog]
Ace Ventura: Fatty.
Melissa Robinson: You're unbelievable. Hiring you was the biggest mistake I ever made.
Ace Ventura: Well, why don't you cry about it. Saddlebags.
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Ace Ventura: Obsess much?
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Lois Einhorn: DIE ANIMAL BOY!
Ace Ventura: Quick Decision
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[mimicking Sean Connery]
Ace Ventura: Lovely party. Pity I wasn't invited.
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Riddle: I don't give a good goddamn about that fish. Fillet it and fast food it if'ya want'to. All I give a damn about's, winning the Super Bowl. My athletes have got to have their heads in the right place. Shit, Roger, you been in this business a long time. You know how superstitious these guys are.
[Roger hides his rabbit foot key chain]
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Lois Einhorn: And somebody get me some coffee!
Ace Ventura: Tonight on Miami Vice, Crockett gets the boss some coffee.
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Riddle: [angry] How in the hell do you loose a five hundred pound fish?
Melissa Robinson: [wants to say something]
Riddle: What?
Melissa Robinson: I'm sorry sir, I was just going to say, that it's not a fish, it's a mammal.
Riddle: Thank you, miss Jacques Cousteau.
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[first lines]
Ace Ventura: Heads up! Good defense! Good defense!
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Lois Einhorn: [after she finishes wrestling with Ace, to the surrounding police officers] Shoot him! Shoot him!
Emilio: [offscreen] Hold your fire!
[walks in with Melissa, gun to his head]
Emilio: Don't shoot!
Melissa Robinson: Put your guns down or this cop gets it. I mean it!
[cocks revolver]
Emilio: She's not joking!
Lois Einhorn: [ignoring them] He kidnapped Snowflake! He killed Roger Podator and was going to kill Dan Marino and meeeeee!
Ace Ventura: Ho ho ho Hooooooooooooo! Fiction can be fun, but I find the reference section a little more enlightening. For instance, if you were to look up the NFL's "All Time Bonehead Plays," you might read about a Miami Dolphin kicker named Ray Finkle, who missed the 26 yard field goal in the closing seconds of Super Bowl XVII.
[takes deep breath]
Ace Ventura: What you wouldn't read about was how Ray Finkle lost his mind was committed to a mental hospital only to escape and join the police force under the assumed identity of a missing hiker manipulating his way to the top in a diabolical scheme to get even with Dan Marino for whom he blamed the entire thing!
[takes another deep, relief breath]
Aguado: What the hell are you talking about?
Ace Ventura: SHE'S NOT LOIS EINHORN!, She's Ray Finkle, she's a man.
Lois Einhorn: He's lying. SHOOT HIIIIMMM!
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[Melissa and Ace are reading news clippings about Ray Finkle]
Melissa Robinson: "Replacement Kicker Having a Great Year." "Ready For Super Bowl, All-Star Kicker Boasts."
Ace Ventura: "Field Goal Sails Wide. Dolphins Lose Super Bowl."
Melissa Robinson: The "Kick Heard Round The World." That was Finkle. The Dolphins lost by one point.
[Ace lets out an impressed whistle. Melissa flips to the next clipping, with a headline that reads "Finkle Contract Not Renewed."]
Melissa Robinson: Poor guy.
Ace Ventura: Poor guy with a motive, baby.
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[coming out of the men's room, all wet with his clothes torn]
Ace Ventura: Do *not* go in there! Pheeww!
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Melissa Robinson: [in her office, she is showing Ace a video of the halftime routine performed by their missing mascot, Snowflake. She sees Ace chewing on either birdseeds or sunflower seeds, and spreading the leftovers in a neat pile on her desk] Would you like an ashtray?
Ace Ventura: Hmm-mmm. I don't smoke. It's a disgusting habit.
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Melissa Robinson: Ace?
Ace Ventura: [holds the phone away from his mouth and waits a second] Thought I left, didn't ya?
Melissa Robinson: [laughs]
Ace Ventura: Ok, I'm really gonna go this time.

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