Garden State
Garden State

Garden State

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User Rating: 0 / 5
(0 votes)
Year: 2004
Genre: Comedy / Drama / Romance
Number of Quotes: 96
Submitted by: TheRudyStyle


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Movie Quotes from Garden State (2004) (Movie)

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Karl Benson: I should get your number.
Andrew Largeman: Yeah... well... I'll call you. I'll get your number from him, because I think he's got it in his... book...
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Andrew Largeman: I think we've corrupted this innocent girl enough for one day!
Sam: I'm not innocent.
Andrew Largeman: Yes, you are! That's what I like about you, okay? And I don't want this guy taking you to some sketchy quarry in the middle of Newark to find crack whores huffing turpentine or pit bulls raping each other or whatever else is down here!
Mark: Man... that's the most worked up I've ever seen you.
Sam: He's protecting me.
Andrew Largeman: So?
Sam: He *likes* me!
Andrew Largeman: Don't be cute.
Sam: He's my knight in shining armor.
Andrew Largeman: Don't talk about knights around Mark, it's a sore subject.
Mark: I'm gonna kill that motherfucker!
Andrew Largeman: Pun intended?
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Andrew Largeman: Dude, we've been patient all day but it's my last day in town and you haven't told us what we're doing. I mean, if you had told me we'd be going on a six-hour scavenger hunt for blow I would've passed.
Mark: Come on, please. If I was going to get you coke we would've gone to the fucking high school football practice. We would've been rolling five hours ago.
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Olivia: Sam, I thought I told you to take the metal wheel out of the hamster cage.
Sam: Oh! I forgot!
Olivia: [holding up a stiff brown lump] Well, you forgot, and now Jelly's dead.
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Olivia: I'm sorry, we just haven't had the time to train them. Who has the time to train them?
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Diego: Does it come with balloons?
Mark: What am I, a birthday clown? NO! It doesn't come with balloons. Suck it off the tap!
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Albert: [about the rickety old boathouse] Unfortunately, if this is the apocalypse, I'm not entirely sure it still floats.
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Mark: The only thing worse than a favor is a favor involving money.
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Sam: Sidecars are for bitches.
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Mark: So this is it...
Andrew Largeman: So knock... knock and barter for Desert Storm trading cards.
Mark: Don't tease me about my hobbies. I don't tease you about being an asshole.
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Mark: You like that, Press Junket, that's improv bitch, you can use it.
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Sam: So what are you here for?
Andrew Largeman: What are you here for?
Sam: Waiting for a friend, you?
Andrew Largeman: I uh...
Sam: Oh fuck, that was so nosy. I'm sorry, ack. I am. I am so nosy. I didn't I didn't mean to be. I am sorry.
Andrew Largeman: No, I just get these headaches. I wanna have em checked out.
Sam: Cool.
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[singing at Andrew's mother's funeral]
Aunt Sylvia Largeman: Thanks for the time that you've given me. The memories are all in my mind. And now that we've come to the end of our rainbow, there's something I must say out loud. Yes, you're once, twice, three times a lady. I love you. Yes, you're once, twice, three times a lady. I love you. I love you.
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Aunt Sylvia Largeman: I made you something. It's a shirt.
Andrew Largeman: Thats... That's good, thank you.
Aunt Sylvia Largeman: Will you try it on now?
Andrew Largeman: Now?
Aunt Sylvia Largeman: Well, in case I have to fix it before you leave again and we don't see you for another nine years. I wanna make sure it fits.
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Gideon Largeman: [on Andrew's answering machine] Andrew, this is your father. Hello? Look, you don't call me back, so I don't know how to do this. If you're not gonna return my calls then there's no way for us to communicate...
[breaks down]
Gideon Largeman: Look, I don't know how to do this but you're gonna need to come home now. Last night... Your mother died last night, Andrew. She drowned. Last night she drowned in the bath.
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Dr. Cohen: You know, our bodies are capable of doing some very funny things when they're consumed by stress and anxiety. Uh, I found my ex-best friend's cufflinks in my wife's purse. I couldn't get an erection for a year and a half. For example.
Andrew Largeman: Wow. Um, but I don't really think that's it...
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Dr. Cohen: Mister... Andrew Largeman?
Andrew Largeman: Yes?
Dr. Cohen: There's absolutely nothing wrong with you
Andrew Largeman: Really?
Dr. Cohen: Just kidding; how the hell would I know?
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Tim: [to Mark's mom, Carol] I had a lovely evening.
[to Andrew]
Tim: By the way, it says BALLS on your face.
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Carol: Oh... guys? Don't stay in here all day. I had to take the batteries out of the carbon monoxide detector; it was beeping all night.
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Andrew Largeman: We're not playing Spin the Bottle; how old are we? More importantly, how old are they?
Jesse: Oh, they're all legal. I think...

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