Snatch
Snatch

Snatch

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User Rating: 0 / 5
(0 votes)
Year: 2000
Genre: Comedy / Crime / Thriller
Number of Quotes: 121
Submitted by: TheRudyStyle


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Movie Quotes from Snatch (2000) (Movie)

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[after hearing about Bullet-Tooth Tony surviving after being shot six times]
Avi: Six times?
Doug the Head: In one sitting.
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Mickey: The deal was you bought it like you saw it. Hey, look, I've helped you as much as I'm going to help you. See that car? Just use it for you're not welcome anymore. You should fuck off now while you still got the legs to carry you.
Gorgeous George: Nobody...
Mickey: Nobody brings a fella the size of you unless they're trying to say something without talking, right boy?
Tommy: Sorry, Mickey. Just give our money back and you can keep the caravan.
Mickey: Why the fuck do I want a caravan that's got no fucking wheels?
[Gorgeous rushes Mickey]
Mickey: You want to settle this with a fight?
Mum O'Neil: Over my dead body! Now, go on! Go on! I'll not have you fighting! You know what happens when you fight.
Mickey: Get her to sit down. For fuck's sake! Want the money? I ain't fucked you. I'll fight you for it. You and me.
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[Doug sees four Jewish kids smoking]
Doug the Head: What are you doing?
Jewish Boy: [spits] It's a free country, isn't it?
Doug the Head: Well it's not a free shop, is it? So fuck off!
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Turkish: [voice over] Boris the Blade, or Boris "the Bullet Dodger." As bent as the Soviet's sickle, and as hard as the hammer that crosses it. Apparently, it's impossible to kill the bastard.
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Mickey: Deadly kick for a fat fucker, ya know that?
Gorgeous George: [throws Mickey into the fence] Cheeky bastard!
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Turkish: Well the rabbit gets fucked.
Tommy: [pauses] Proper fucked?
Turkish: Yes, before "Zee Germans" get there.
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Errol: Fuckface, who's speaking to you? He asked him, didn't he?
Turkish: Fuckface... I like that one Errol. I'll have to remember that one next time I'm climbing off yer mum.
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Turkish: I can't make him fight, can I?
Brick Top: You're not much use to me alive are you, Turkish?
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Bullet Tooth Tony: I want to know who blagged Brick-Top's bookies.
Mullet: Do me a favor, Ton!
Bullet Tooth Tony: I will do you a favor, Mullet. I'll not get out of this car and bash the living fuck out of you in front of all your girlfriends.
[Mullet hunkers down to the car window]
Mullet: Got to make it worth my while, mate. Jesus, Tony, you know that...
[Tony seizes his tie and rolls up the window, wedging Mullet's head in it]
Bullet Tooth Tony: Comfortable, Mullet? It seems sadly ironic that it's that tie that's got you into this pickle. Now you just take all the time you want.
[He starts the car forward]
Mullet: What the fuck are you doing, Ton?
Bullet Tooth Tony: I'm driving down the street with your head stuck in my window. What do you think I'm doing, you pen-ass?
Mullet: Slow down, Ton.
Bullet Tooth Tony: [sniffs] You been using dogshit for toothpaste, Mullet?
Mullet: Slow down, Ton! Slow down, Tony!
Bullet Tooth Tony: I don't think I'll slow down. I think I'll speed up. You can play some music if you like.
[He turns on the radio; Madonna's "Lucky Star" is playing]
Bullet Tooth Tony: Oh, I love this track.
Mullet: I think...
Bullet Tooth Tony: Yes, Mullet?
Mullet: I think it's two black guys, in a pawn shop on Smith street.
Bullet Tooth Tony: You better not be telling me porky pies.
Mullet: I'm fucking telling you, it's two black guys who work off a pawn shop in fucking Smith Street!
Avi: That's very effective, Tony. It's not too subtle, but effective.
[Tony accelerates and turns toward Smith Street]
Avi: Are we taking him with us?
[Tony rolls down the window, releasing Mullet's head and dumping him on the roadside]
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[pricing a diamond for Bad Boy Lincoln]
Sol: No, it's a moissanite.
Bad Boy Lincoln: A what-a-nite?
Sol: A moissanite is an artificial diamond, Lincoln. It's Mickey Mouse, mate. Spurious. Not genuine. And it's worth... Fuck-all.
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Turkish: I'm sorry, Mickey.
Mickey: Did ya do it? Then why are ya sorry?
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Tyrone: I don't want that dog dribbling on my seats.
Vinny: Your seats? Tyrone, this is a stolen car, mate.
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Policeman: So, what you doin here?
Turkish: I'm taking the dog for a walk. What's the problem?
Policeman: What's in the car?
Turkish: Seats and a steering wheel.
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Brick Top: Gimme that fucking shooter!
Pikey: I'll give you your shooter ya cunt ya!
[Blam Blam]
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Turkish: [looks at the caravan] Look at it. How am I suppose to run this thing from that? We'll need a proper office. I want a new one, Tommy. You're going to buy it for me.
Tommy: Why me?
Turkish: Well, you know about caravans.
Tommy: How's that?
Turkish: You spent a summer in one, which means you know more than me. And I don't want to have my pants pulled down over the price.
Tommy: What's wrong with this one?
Turkish: [Pulls the caravan's door from its hinges] Oh, nothing, Tommy. It's tiptop. I'm just not sure about the colour.
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Turkish: I fail to recognize the correlation between "losing 10K", "hospitalizing gorgeous" and "a good deal".
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Turkish: What's happening with them sausages, Charlie?
Sausage Charlie: Five minutes, Turkish.
Turkish: It was two minutes five minutes ago.
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[Tyrone just backed into Franky Four Fingers' van]
Tyrone: I didn't see it there.
Vinny: It's a four ton truck, Tyrone. Its not as if it's a bag of fucking peanuts, is it?
Tyrone: It was a funny angle.
[All three turn and look back at the truck]
Vinny: It's behind you Tyrone. Whenever you reverse, things come from behind you.
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Brick Top: I don't care if he's Muhammad I'm hard Bruce Lee. You can't change fighters.
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Tommy: Who took the jam outta your doughnut?
Turkish: You took the fucking jamm outta my doughnut, Tommy. You did.

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