Zoolander
Zoolander

Zoolander

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User Rating: 0 / 5
(0 votes)
Year: 2001
Genre: Comedy
Number of Quotes: 98
Submitted by: TheRudyStyle


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Movie Quotes from Zoolander (2001) (Movie)

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Hansel: The results are in amigo. What's left to ponder?
[Derek glares at him]
Hansel: Nice Comeback! Ha ha.
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Derek Zoolander: Do you understand that the world does not revolve around you and your do whatever it takes, ruin as many people's lives, so long as you can make a name for yourself as an investigatory journalist, no matter how many friends you lose or people you leave dead and bloodied along the way, just so long so you can make a name for yourself as an investigatory journalist, no matter how many friends you lose or people you leave dead and bloodied and dying along the way?
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Matilda Jeffries: I've been trying to reach you for a week.
Derek Zoolander: A week? What, are you having a whack attack? I saw you this afternoon, dum-dum.
Matilda Jeffries: That was last Friday.
Derek Zoolander: Uhh Earth to Matilda, I was at a day spa. Day, D-A-I-Y-E. Okay?
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Brint: Or the way Hansel combs his hair?
Meekus: Or like, doesn't, it's like, ex-squeeze me, but have you ever heard of styling gel?
Brint: I'm sure Hansel's heard of styling gel, he's a male model.
Meekus: Uh, earth to Brint, I was making a joke.
Brint: Uh, Earth to Meekus, duh, okay I knew that!
Meekus: Uh earth to Brint, I'm not so sure you did cuz you were all 'well I'm sure he's heard of styling gel' like you *didn’t* know it was a joke!
Brint: I knew it was a joke Meekus, I just didn't get it right away!
Meekus: Earth to Brint...
Derek Zoolander: Would you guys stop it already?
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Derek Zoolander: What is this? A center for ants? How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read... if they can't even fit inside the building?
Mugatu: Derek, this is just a small...
Derek Zoolander: I don't wanna hear your excuses! The building has to be at least... three times bigger than this!
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Larry Zoolander: I just thank the Lord she didn't live to see her son as a mermaid.
Derek Zoolander: Mer-man!
[high-pitched cough]
Derek Zoolander: Mer-man!
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VH1 Reporter: Derek, are you worried about Hansel?
Derek Zoolander: Uhh, not as much as I'm worried about Gretel.
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Derek Zoolander: For serious.
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Derek Zoolander: There was a moment last night, when she was sandwiched between the two Finnish dwarves and the Maori tribesmen, where I thought, "Wow, I could really spend the rest of my life with this woman".
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Hansel: Listen to your friend Billy Zane, he's a cool dude!
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Hansel: Who are you tryin' to get crazy with, ese? Don't you know I'm loco?
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Katinka: I do not like snoopy reporter with lack of fashion sense, not one little bit.
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[after throwing Matilda into the street from Mugatu's spa]
Katinka: I suggest you and your Kmart Jaclyn Smith Collection outfit... stay the hell away from Derek Zoolander!
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Protestor: Mugatu! Screw you and your little dog too!
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Derek Zoolander: How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read if they can't even fit inside the building?
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Mugatu: Todd, are you not aware that I get farty and bloated with a foamy latte?
Todd: My mistake Jacobeam!
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[after spitting out and spilling some bad coffee all over his assistant]
Mugatu: Todd! Are you not aware that I get farty and bloated with a foamy latte?
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Mugatu: Obey my dog!
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Mugatu: It's that damn Hansel! He's so hot right now!
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Derek Zoolander: Put a cork in it, Zane!

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